That’s Right Nate

Thoughts from a right thinker.

You’ve Been Left Behind Sucker

with 18 comments

A great new website has openned up and unfortuntely I only have one post now because I’ve been spending all morning using it to write mails to Catholics I know, liberal politicians, and people who have questioned my religion in the past.  www.youvebeenleftbehind.com is the world’s first (for all I know) post rapture emailing system.  When us believers are called up to Heaven, we’re still able to send one last taunt to the non-believers from Heaven.

According to the website, “We have set up a system to send documents by the email, to the addresses you provide, 6 days after the “Rapture” of the Church. This occurs when 3 of our 5 team members scattered around the U.S fail to log in over a 3 day period. Another 3 days are given to fail safe any false triggering of the system.”  I wonder who the 2 team members that they are pretty sure aren’t going to be saved are.

The only problem is it only saves us to 62 email addresses and I’m on 59 and I’m just at Pelosi in the alphabet.   Looks like good news for Gloria Steinem and Barbara Streisand.  I’m basically using the service to taunt people, but if you have a friend who won’t be saved (why?) the site explains “You will also be able to give them some help in living out their remaining time. In the encrypted portion of your account you can give them access to your banking, brokerage, hidden valuables, and powers of attorneys’ (you won’t be needing them any more, and the gift will drive home the message of love). There won’t be any bodies, so probate court will take 7 years to clear your assets to your next of Kin. 7 years of course is all the time that will be left. So, basically the Government of the AntiChrist gets your stuff, unless you make it available in another way. You can also send information based on scripture as to what will happen next. Each fulfilled prophecy will cause your letter and plea to be remembered and a decision to be made.”

The site also offers a wonderful selection of letters from people using their service (None of these letters have bank account information) at http://youvebeenleftbehind.blogspot.com/

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Written by thatsrightnate

May 29, 2008 at 5:58 am

Posted in Religion

Tagged with , , ,

18 Responses

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  1. You keep sticking it to us Catholics, “brother” of mine, but what exactly is your church? YOu get all judgmental about Obama and Wright, but the only time I’ve seen you out of bed before noon on Sunday was to pick up Britney at Dunkin’ Donuts. So, tell us all, what church do you go to? The Church of the Immaculate Capitalist Pig?

    steve

    May 29, 2008 at 7:21 am

  2. I can’t wait until you read your letter.

    thatsrightnate

    May 29, 2008 at 8:22 am

  3. Can’t answer the question can you?

    steve

    May 29, 2008 at 9:13 am

  4. That’s not good. I did float an idea years ago of setting up something that allowed you to send posthumous emails to people telling them really what you thought of them but a mix of it possibly being a bit unethical and not actually bothering to do anything about it, means i have lost out yet again.

    Lucy

    May 29, 2008 at 11:16 am

  5. Don’t you hate when somebody independently comes up with the same idea you had. I think John McCain is probably kicking himself for George Bush coming up with his foreign policy first.

    thatsrightnate

    May 29, 2008 at 3:58 pm

  6. I’m pretty sure I’m going to be left behind. So, where do I get that bank account information?

    zenyenta

    May 29, 2008 at 7:33 pm

  7. You won’t get it until the rapture anyway. If I didn’t run out of addresses in the P’s I would have sent you a nice “wish you were here” letter.

    thatsrightnate

    May 29, 2008 at 8:28 pm

  8. Now here IS a Rap-True

    .

    Tor Hershman

    June 4, 2008 at 11:56 am

  9. According to the Bible there will be only one ‘rapture’ and that is when Christ comes the second time to take His people home to Heaven. The wicked will be destroyed until after the 1000 years.

    puppydazzles

    June 5, 2008 at 12:47 pm

  10. Hopefully, when he comes for me, my emails will go out.

    thatsrightnate

    June 5, 2008 at 6:19 pm

  11. Wait, wait, wait … there is no logic behind this. You could just send the same emails and letters NOW and be sure that they got there. But I guess giving all my banking and personal information to a random website makes much more sense.

    Daniel

    June 5, 2008 at 6:52 pm

  12. […] after the ‘Rapture’ of the church”.  This topic is ridiculed much better on thatsrightnate.com, but after I had a look for myself, yes there it […]

  13. […] days after the ‘Rapture’ of the church”. This topic is ridiculed much better on thatsrightnate.com, but after I had a look for myself, yes there it […]

    Hello world! « Nope

    June 5, 2008 at 8:09 pm

  14. i really don’t understand the skepticism expressed by some of the commenters. please folks, drop your cynical attitudes and read the FAQ section of this excellent website. the incredible writing style on display there is clearly the work of a very dedicated individual, undiluted by any editing which might have diminished his powerful words. it’s a truly amazing statement of religious devotion! his selfless motivation in providing this web service is poignantly revealed in the last sentence: “Its one last opportunity behind the evidence of the rapture that’s all it is.” it would take a heart of stone to refuse this appeal to save misguided loved ones, when the price of eternal life is a single paypal charge of only forty dollars!

    http://www.youvebeenleftbehind.com/faq.html

    gina

    December 30, 2008 at 9:42 am

  15. Don’t forget the fun of taunting the socialists in this country from Heaven with the ultimate I told you so.

    thatsrightnate

    December 30, 2008 at 11:05 am

  16. I really like your site. With so many examples of your personal schadenfreude for everyone but you, and the hilarious number of spelling errors in your posts – not to mention that two months after McCain lost you are still whining about Palin’s treatment in the media – it is just so deliciously pathetic. I’m feeling much better now.

    Schadenfreude really works, Nate! I was depressed and pissed off, but now that I see how much more rediculous and pathetic you are, I feel much better about life in general.

    Keep up your good work. I’ll check back.

    Oh, I’m an atheist too…good luck on that rapture thing. You clowns are going to start World War III thinking it’s just what Jesus wanted, and then when you’re all dead and the planet is a charred hunk of rock which will never harbor life again and Jesus is nowhere to be found, then we’ll hear one lone Christian pick his head up from the death and destruction and say, “My Bad.” and collapse.

    Holden Caulfield

    December 31, 2008 at 10:50 am

  17. If that happens Mr. Caulfield I will be that one lone Christian voice in the wilderness.

    thatsrightnate

    December 31, 2008 at 3:41 pm

  18. Geez Holden I just did a google search on you. You are one messed up dude. Nice website. You almost seem proud of your failures. Also, nice job calling me out about my spelling when you’re a dropout.

    http://holdencaulfield.org/default.aspx

    thatsrightnate

    December 31, 2008 at 3:44 pm


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