That’s Right Nate

Thoughts from a right thinker.

The Entire Country Will Be Fat by 2048

with 2 comments

When I had the guts to tell America that my 12 year old daughter was a little porker, I got lambasted by several visitors to my blog who didn’t like that I called a fattie a fattie.  They were all over me for trying to help my daughter be more socially acceptable in high school and be able to laugh at “No Fat Chicks” shirts and bumper stickers instead of feeling personally offended by them.   Well, a new scientific study has redeemed me.

The US will face a health disaster by 2030 when 86% of Americans will be overweight, with every single resident tipping the scales by 2048, according to new projections, published in the journal Obesity, are based on government survey data collected between the 1970s and 2004.

As a nation we must look for early warning signs.  I think we need to setup some canaries in this candy coated coalmine.  Let’s play close attention to Kate Bosworth,  Nicole Richie, and Keira Knightly–if they begin to puff up we know it is time for the rest of us to go on a diet.

It is also of utmost importance that parents begin to drastically limit the portion sizes they are feeding their toddlers and infants now.  If we are going to hit 84% obesity now we are going to be forced to import our models, actresses, jockeys, gymnasts, dancers, and most of our musicians from other countries thus further deteriorating the US economy.

Finally, I believe it is time to eliminate lunch from our schools.  By not feeding students at noon, they will save on average between 600-1000 calories per day.  This will go a long way to ensuring their future health and more importantly appearance.

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Written by thatsrightnate

August 9, 2008 at 12:21 pm

2 Responses

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  1. Bee

    August 10, 2008 at 12:55 pm

  2. no shit dumbass. of course america is obese.
    but that’s not an excuse to refer to your daughter like that.
    there are other more gentle ways of helping your daughter become fit again.
    what you’re doing will probably just make her feel self-conscious.
    and i can’t believe you would actually refer to her as a fatty.
    SHE. IS. YOUR. DAUGHTER.
    YOU. DON’T. CALL. YOUR. DAUGHTER. NAMES.
    YOU. ARE. AN. AWFUL. FATHER.
    i’d also like to add that YOU raised her! you made her FAT!

    Jake McConnor

    August 30, 2008 at 3:15 am


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