That’s Right Nate

Thoughts from a right thinker.

I Have Gone International

with 19 comments

I can be rather obsessive about my blog.  I love to check the statistics and see where people are visiting me from.  Recently, I had a bunch of people from Grinnell College checking out one of my stories about McCain’s commanding lead over Obama.  Unfortunately, it was on a private area and I couldn’t see what they were saying.

Recently, I found myself being discussed on a Portuguese website.  Now, I find it the height of arrogance to have a blog in a language other than English particularly if you understand English as the woman who runs this blog clearly does.  English really should be the official language of the internets.

That said, this blog posting was about me so I’m torn over exactly how I feel about it.  It did seem to be very flattering and I noticed she was talking about the Dark Knight which makes me think she may be taking my boycott international which would be a big help.  She also was apparently very impressed by my selection of Barry Manillow as a White Male of Distinction.  I assume he’s very popular in Portugal.  One nice thing I noticed is if I translated this correctly she referred to me as a “diamond in a river without any water.”

As a way of saying “Hello” and “Thank you” to any Portuguese visitors I have had a message translated for them, “Gosto de queijo de bode muito. Às vezes eu gosto de encher ovos em meus sapatos como danço pelas ruas cantando voa-me à lua. Meu carro é uma escova de cabelo que anda de em estradas feitas dos bicos de galos velhos. “

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Written by thatsrightnate

August 10, 2008 at 5:20 pm

19 Responses

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  1. Dear Nate,

    Hi, nice to meet you! I’m the woman whose blog talked about you yesterday. First of all, I’m not Portuguese, I’m Brazilian! You see, Brazil has a much larger population than that of Portugal (about twenty times more). You Americans are 300 million people, Brazilians are almost 200 million, which makes us the fifth biggest population in the world. We’re also the fifth largest country in size. In fact, we’d be bigger than the U.S. if you didn’t count Alaska.
    I found you through Google Images. I was looking for some kind of image to celebrate the first 50,000 visits to my blog, and then I found your photo of the children. As I started reading, I was intrigued that you thought that 50,000 visits were equivalent to 50,000 readers. I continued to read and found your opinion about The Mummy 3 and your boycott to the Dark Knight and, obviously, I started to laugh. I still wasn’t sure if you were just clueless or having a blast of fun. After I read that you gave Barry Manillow the White Male Distinction Award, I no longer had doubts – your blog is brilliant satire. Like I wrote in my post, I haven’t laughed so hard in one week. Keep up the good work! And, if you want, leave a comment in my blog (it can be in English) about how arrogant it is that we don’t adopt English as our only language. My readers will have lots of fun.

    Warm regards,
    Lola

    Lola

    August 11, 2008 at 2:51 pm

  2. I am not familiar with your country except through your fine steak houses. However, I would suggest you not forget that we have 100 million more people than you and as for territory you can be sure we are counting Alaska. I would also hope that your country learn to distinguish satire. However, having never seen a Brazilian stand up I am not surprised. I will post on your blog as a symbol of universal brotherhood. I dream of a day when I can help the Republican party franchise itself into other countries. With the name Lola I can see where your love of Barry Manilow comes from.

    thatsrightnate

    August 11, 2008 at 3:07 pm

  3. Nate, I’m sure you’d enjoy being Brazilian. I honestly think we are one of the most friendly people in the world, or at least we have this reputation – internationally! We are beloved by Christian fundamentalists and Muslim fundamentalists alike. Every time we mention “Brazil”, people associate us with soccer (a much more intelligent sport than, say, the kind of football you practice), carnival, samba, beautiful women and the rain forest. This is not always good, since we’d like to be taken seriously, and no, we do not have monkeys running around our streets, and Brazilian women were born to be much more than sex objects, but it’s way better to have this reputation than having the fame of a nation that promotes wars against other countries and is keen of wasting (the US represents only 5% of the world’s population but consumes as if it were 30%). I know, however, that most Americans are nice and friendly people. But we cannot help disliking the empire you represent. And I’m sure you know that Bush is not a popular name anywhere in the world. I think most people in Brazil support Obama. At least in my blog we do (I liked Hillary as well, since I’m a feminist). I had a survey asking my readers to define themselves ideologically, and 70% are more to the left politically, and liberal (as in supporting abortion, gay rights, legalization of marijuana etc). Also, we’re huge fans of The Dark Knight. I’m sure you’re one of us too, even though you can’t admit it. Nobody praises Barry Manilow for nothing. That was a give-away, Nate.
    I’ll be waiting for your sign of “universal brotherhood”.
    And I don’t love Barry Manilow, but since I was born in the late 60s, he was part of my adolescence. In fact, it might have been some twenty years that I haven’t heard his name mentioned. But, thanks to you, here we are, talking about this great American icon (almost as great as Joel Schumacher’s Batman). Regards!

    Lola

    August 11, 2008 at 3:55 pm

  4. Maybe, Lola, coming from a land of beautiful women, you have some advise for my brother in law on how he can better raise his fat daughter??? Nate is very sad about the girl’s hulking size and large acne postules.

    steve

    August 11, 2008 at 4:30 pm

  5. Yeah, so I’ve read in another post… Maybe I’m delusional, but I can only hope he doesn’t even have a daughter!

    Lola

    August 11, 2008 at 5:22 pm

  6. Sadly, he does. She’s thirteen and not handling her parents’ divorce very well, not that she was attractive before Nate’s wife left him. As you can imagine, Nate is beside himself with worry and regret. No one believes in Family Values more than Nate. Now his daughter gets fatter and homelier each day and her mother isn’t there and doesn’t see the problem. It really has been a test of Nate’s faith and values. So, if you have any diet tips or anything, I’m sure my niece would be grateful. She loves the Miss Universe pageant and Ricky MArtin.

    steve

    August 11, 2008 at 5:41 pm

  7. I’m sorry to say that I am crushed to hear this description of Brazil. As a country with a definitive class system I really have hope that the Republican party can thrive there. However, other than praising the great Joel Schumacher Batman your comments are such a disappointment. I really hope that I can just chalk it up to the language barrier.

    thatsrightnate

    August 11, 2008 at 6:04 pm

  8. You’re right as always, Nate: not being born a native of the Engllish language has made me a leftist. And an atheist. And a feminist. Got that, Steve? A f-e-m-i-n-i-s-t! Unfortunately, I don’t have any beauty tips for Nate’s poor daughter. I burned my bra ages ago. Seriously now, about Brazil’s “definitive class system”: I just read that, for the first time ever, the majority of Brazilians are now officially middle class. 51% belong to class C. Moi included. Pardon my French. I just remembered how you hate frogs! Brazil has a leftist government for the first time in its history. Lula (from the Worker’s Party) is on his second term now, and has a 70% approval rate. Unlike some other presidents on their second terms…
    On a lighter note, I don’t much appreciate the little icon I got before my name. Could I change that? I’d like to have a cute one like Steve’s. I’ll pass the American eagle and flag.

    Lola

    August 11, 2008 at 6:22 pm

  9. Ahh, I told my husband about this blog (yes, I’m a feminist but I have a husband, so there’s still hope for Nate’s daughter!), and asked him, “Is there any chance that Nate is not being satirical and that he really IS a right-wing nut?”. And my wise husband answered, “No. Reactionaries aren’t funny”. I rest my case.

    Lola

    August 11, 2008 at 6:37 pm

  10. Just because she has a mustache, there’s no indication Nate’s daughter is a feminist. Very, very few American women are lesbians.

    steve

    August 11, 2008 at 6:42 pm

  11. Steve, with Nate as a father and you as an uncle, there’s no doubt that Nate’s daughter will become a feminist soon. But maybe, you know, a feminist married to a man. Please tell Nate that I excluded his comment from my post. I explain it over there at my blog: http://www.escrevalolaescreva.blogspot.com (where he left his now-excluded comment).

    Lola

    August 11, 2008 at 7:03 pm

  12. Good for you shutting down Nate. He’s always threatening to ban me from this site.

    steve

    August 11, 2008 at 7:14 pm

  13. Steve, I didn’t shut him down. I’m going to dedicate a full post to his hilarious comment. But you know, for someone who says he doesn’t know a thing about Brazil, he knew quite a lot. He knew about our 1964 coup d’etat, which became a military dictatorship that lasted 21 years. And yes, the CIA and the American government sadly took part in this coup, as they did in all military coups in my continent (including the 2002 one against Chavez in Venezuela). But Nate got one thing wrong. Janio Quadros was the crazy president who was elected in 1961, and renounced later. His vice-president, João Goulart, or Jango, took over, but he was seen as lending to the left, so the military (with the help of the CIA) orchestrated the coup. Nate’s right (as always) that the US was one of the first countries to “recognize” the new government… a government no one had elected! Democracy and freedom are such relative concepts, after all!
    Don’t I deserve a cute icon after all this information?

    Lola

    August 11, 2008 at 7:24 pm

  14. Nate, since you and I are both big fans of Joel Schumacher’s Batman, maybe you’d like to read a post I wrote about the nipple factor in that film. Can I say that word here? Nipple? You republicans don’t seem to like that imagery very much…
    http://escrevalolaescreva.blogspot.com/2008/07/santos-mamilos-batman.html

    Lola

    August 11, 2008 at 10:01 pm

  15. Sorry you can’t say nipple on my blog. As you know I can’t read your strange foreign language which makes your blog difficult for me.

    thatsrightnate

    August 12, 2008 at 3:33 pm

  16. Ah, thank you for the icon. Much cuter this time. As for not reading my strange foreign language, what’s the Google translator for? I can’t believe you’re putting down private-owned property!
    By the way, when I read about the Chinese girl being dubbed in the Olympics, I thought of your daughter. Poor girls!

    Lola

    August 12, 2008 at 3:45 pm

  17. My daughter is nothing like that. You should hear her sing. I definitely discouraged her from music lessons by that age.

    thatsrightnate

    August 12, 2008 at 3:56 pm

  18. And the dance recitals were even worse. Speaking of worse. I do not like this new icon. It makes me look like a bug or pest.

    steve

    August 12, 2008 at 3:58 pm

  19. Yeah, I agree, Steve: your previous icon was much nicer. Mine at least is pink. It reminds me that I’m a woman. (I got your email, Nate. Thanks. I’ll answer it as soon as I have time, because, you know, even women have occupations).

    Lola

    August 12, 2008 at 5:55 pm


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