That’s Right Nate

Thoughts from a right thinker.

Beware of American Girl Place

with 2 comments

You may have noticed an unusual lack of posts from me the past 2 days.   This is because of an overwhelming outrage I am feeling over my treatment at the Chicago American Girl Place on Michigan Avenue.  My friend Tom and I showed up at 4PM for what was advertised as the biggest tea party event in Chicago.   This seemed like the perfect place to let lose my pent up rage over the passing of the health care bill.   I had a Stop the Socialist Takeover of Medicine Sign that shows Obama hitting a doctor with a beer bottle from behind.   Tom had a What Part of Constitusion Don’t You Understand sign.

I should have known something was up when the women at the front door wouldn’t let us bring our signs inside.   I have met some very charming and attractive honeys at Tea Party events from places like Smart Girl Politlics so American Girl seemed like a natural.  In fact, the women here were younger.  However, none of them seemed to be very passionate about politics.  When we finally got up to the rally, I saw we were the only two guys there.  Ordinarily I would have loved my chances, but most of the women had small children with them and again they didn’t seem very passionate about their politics.

Finally, an author came to speak.   She wanted to talk about some girl named Molly who grew up in World War II.   As she indoctrinated the room full of impressionable young children with stories of the mid-1940s and the glories of the new deal, Tom and I immediately took action.  We began to challenge her supposed facts and remind her that FDR was an avowed socialist who caused the Great Depression with his massive spending.  The American Girl people actually called the police on us.  As we were escorted out, a rather attractive red haired woman with a rather homely daughter reached into her purse.   I thought she was giving me her phone number, but instead she sprayed both Tom and I in the eyes with pepper spray.

I believe that the whole tea party rally was a ruse to indoctrinate us.  This was unlike any tea party I had been at before and I can say that I was duped. I warn any other tea partiers to avoid American Girl.  They are most definitely a liberal front.


Written by thatsrightnate

March 26, 2010 at 10:40 pm

2 Responses

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  1. My old girlfriend wanted to keep her daughter’s gift a secret, so she had the American Girl doll sent to my place to keep until Christmas. 8 years later, I’m still getting American Girl catalogs. My mailman must think I’m some kind of pervert! “Oh, he likes dollies, does he?” Great! My point is, the American Girl cult is worse than the Scientologists. You were lucky to get out, Nate.


    March 27, 2010 at 8:01 am

  2. Thanks Wrecks. I really don’t believe that selling dolls should be mixed with our message of resistance. I too have issues with catalogs. I bought my sister a Fossil watch and a friend’s child a toy from Land of Nod. I receive mailings from both companies on a weekly basis that I have zero interest in.


    March 27, 2010 at 10:14 am

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