That’s Right Nate

Thoughts from a right thinker.

In Honor of Confederate History Month

with 4 comments

I was thrilled to hear yesterday that Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell was issuing a proclamation to make April Confederate History Month.   I’ve never talked a whole lot about the Civil War, but I have a connection to Confederate history.   My grandfather’s uncle Beauregard Peele served under Jubal Early with the Army of the Valley before he was eventually shot and killed at the Battle of Belle Grove.

My grandfather had no direct memory of his uncle, but Beauregard Peele has always held a special place in family history, as the only Peele to be shot in battle by the enemy.  Until World War II, he had been the only family member to be shot in battle at all.   Beauregard was a dashing man and a great horseman.  He stood over 6 foot 3 inches tall and the loves of his life were his horse named Clover and his wife named Susan.   His letters to Susan provide a great chronicle of his life in the Civil War.  This is my favorite letter of his:

October 15, 1864

My Dearest Susan,

This war drags on at an indomitable pace and brings me to the very depths of a deep and abiding sorrow.  I have seen brave men vanquished at my side and I have ordered the finest of this generation to their irrevocable demise.   Oh how I long to be back home with you beloved in the lush green fields of our home.  When I close my eyes I can see it and I can hear them singing one of their simple working songs.   This reminds me, a Major Whitlock in my company swears that the slaves give directions to escape through these songs, so you may want to curtail their songs and consider having every third one whipped just in case.

I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know that President Lincoln has been steered to take this country down the wrong path by his beloved German philosophers.   The other day the men were reading The Communist Manifesto by Karl Marx and Freidrich Engels and  I swear though my German be terrible rusty that President Lincoln is a communist.  Now he comes to take our guns, but my beloved Susan I fear that he will take our liberty next. And I am willing—perfectly willing—to lay down all my joys in this life, to save Virginia’s 10th amendment rights and our God given right to own other human beings.

Susan my love for you is without bounds and nothing shall ever be able to tear you from my heart.   My thoughts are consumed entirely by you and by the damnable chafing I have been feeling since June.   If I can but acquire one bottle of Doctor Pendegrast’s rejuvenation powder, it will be pure bliss.   My thighs have rubbed raw and only soaking them in cold water seems to bring me even temporary relief from the itching and burning sensation.

My beloved, it is thoughts of you that sustain me.  It is dreams of you that fill my nights and the hope of our reunion that lead me on through these insufferable days. The memories of the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most gratified to God and to you that I have enjoyed them for so long.  I long for our games of stern headmistress and errant school boy and lion and lion tamer.   Forever, will I envision you giving my backside a stern caning until I am a blubbering mess.   We are all so lonely .   The other day I let Captain Messa tickle me as he is prone to do, but I immediately regretted it.   I hope you can forgive my foolishness.  My beloved please understand that men will from time to time tickle each other and it means very little.

My dearest, we shall be entwined in a battle for our very survival tomorrow and I must close this letter so that I might soak my thighs for a few hours before I escape this place to slumber and sweet dreams of you and our nights spent together in black face making love and pretending to be slaves.

With a Boundless Love,

Colonel Beauregard Peele

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Written by thatsrightnate

April 7, 2010 at 9:28 pm

4 Responses

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  1. How special that you have this missive. The ironic thing is that if the Colonel were alive today it sounds like he’d fit in perfectly with today’s GOP, both in political and social views and the tickling.

    zenyenta

    April 8, 2010 at 3:50 am

  2. Yes, I think he’d be a party leader today

    thatsrightnate

    April 8, 2010 at 5:44 am

  3. Do you know if I can still get any of that Doctor Pendegrast’s rejuvenation powder? Old Timey medicine always works the best. As soon as Pharmacists started getting learning and fancy degrees, healthcare went straight downhill.

    wrecksracer

    April 8, 2010 at 6:44 am

  4. I have never come across the rejuvenation powder, but from what I understand it was 50% taclcum powder and 50% opium.

    thatsrightnate

    April 8, 2010 at 7:26 pm


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