Tom the Bartender on Limbaugh and Obama

Long time readers of this blog will remember Tom the Bartender from when the two of us discussed the election back in November.  Tom is what they call a man’s man.  He’s a throwback to an earlier time.  Life behind the bar has taught him a lot about life.  He’s had his share of ups and downs and knows how a woman can get a bit tipsy around closing time and pick up a bartender just to take him back to her place and stick with him a couple of years just so she can ride high on the child support gravy train.  Oh yeah, Tommy’s got some war stories.  He’s also a great judge of character, a trait that probably comes from seeing people stewing in their own vomit night in and night out.

“Heya Tommy!” I said as I took my customary stool at the end of the bar.

“Nate, it sure is good to see you,” he smiled as he poured me a draft, “business hasn’t been good”

“Really Tommy? I thought bars were recession proof,” I asked.

“Don’t I wish.  That Obama has messed up this economy and he’s only been President for like a week,” he grumbled.

“Its been 3 weeks Tom,” I corrected him.

“Geez, can’t we impeach him or something.  Did you hear what he said about my boy Rush?” he asked.

“He said people shouldn’t listen to Limbaugh.  I heard that.  Way to stand up for the 1st amendment Mr. President,” I agreed.

“He’s still sore that Limbaugh called him out on calling himself black a few years back,” chided Tom.

“He did?” I asked, “what did he say?”

Tom arched his brow deep in thought and replied, “He said Obama didn’t want to be black and should  just renounce being black and declare himself white.”

“Yeah,” I responded, “You’ve got to admit there are a lot of advantages in this country to not being white.”

“Tell me about it,” said Tom, “We’ve always got to be so politically correct.  Don’t get me wrong.  Rush and I have nothing against having a black President.  We just want him to be a miserable failure.”

“Yeah, I’ve been praying for the same thing, but I don’t think that’s racist.  I think its just being a patriot,” I agreed.

“And that’s one thing you are Nate.  Have the next one on me,” he said pouring me another draft.  “You know that stimulus package Obama is pushing is a load of crap and Rush is right to call him out on it.  All of our money is going to go to the unemployed and people without medical coverage.  How does that help me?  Those people don’t know how to manage their money.  That’s why their poor.  Give tax cuts to business and they’ll put those people to work.”

“That makes sense to me Tom.  When I’m doing well, I’m a big tipper,” I said.

“I don’t know about that, but you can bet I’m not getting huge tips from poor people.  They’re all concerned with feeding their family and paying for heat and stuff like that,” he said, “This stuff is all Keyesian Economics.   Don’t get me wrong, I like Alan Keyes, but he doesn’t know anything about economics.”

“So what does Rush want to do about the economy?” I asked.

“Well Rush says that since 46% of the country voted for John McCain, Rush should get to determine how to spend 46% of the stimulus package,” said Tom wiping down the bar.

“I read that in the Wall Street Journal,” I agreed, “I couldn’t believe he was willing to give him more than half.  I think Limbaugh really is very generous.”

“He’s a prince.  You know my wife’s uncle was one of his doctors.  He says Rush is a great guy.  You remember in 1994 when he pushed the Republican congress to shut down the government instead of compromising with Clinton,” He asked.

“Do I ever.  Those were some days,” I said.

“I think we can shut it down even longer this time.   You know you just have to have hope Nate,” said Tom.

“You sure Tommy.  You sure do,” I agreed and sipped my beer.